Bereavement, loneliness and support
The death of a loved one can be overwhelming and you may feel very alone.
Bereavement, grief and loss can cause many different symptoms that affect people in different ways. There’s no right or wrong way to feel – your experience will be as individual as you are.
Experts generally accept that we go through four stages of bereavement or grief:
- Accepting that your loss is real
- Experiencing the pain of grief
- Adjusting to life without the person
- Putting less emotional energy into grieving and putting it into something new
Although most people go through all these stages, you may not necessarily move smoothly from one to the next.
Your grief might feel chaotic and out of control, but these feelings will eventually become less intense over time.
Dr Abhijit Bagade, Consultant in Public Health Medicine in Suffolk explains why he believes that you should not feel that you have to deal with bereavement on your own:
“You might feel alone and isolated and think that no one understands, but people do understand. When you lose someone, be kind to yourself and take the time and steps you need to come to terms with your loss in the best way you can.
If you reach out and talk about it, you will find there is help available at every step. Your family and friends, people at work or a group you belong to can be supportive and listen to you. Or, perhaps a local bereavement group can provide you with both support and an opportunity to meet new people.
By following the links below, you can find out what support is available, both online and in your local community, including bereavement groups and organisations who have qualified counsellors, then choose what is best for you.”
Public Health Suffolk’s Healthy Suffolk website has a ‘Coping with Bereavement’ page with a range of resources and information that includes a useful booklet to download:
The NHS website provides advice and links to support:
East Suffolk and North East Essex Foundation Trust (ESNEFT) provides bereavement services at both the Ipswich and Colchester hospitals:
- esneft.nhs.uk – Bereavement services
- Ipswich Hospital bereavement team Tel: 01473 704 498
St Elizabeth Hospice in Ipswich provides emotional support and advice, useful leaflets and booklets, the 565 Service which provides emotional support for children, young people and families living with a family member with progressive illness, and a link to GriefChat – a third party service where you can talk directly with a specially trained bereavement counsellor:
- stelizabethhospice.org.uk – Bereavement support
- stelizabethhospice.org.uk – 565 Service
- Emotional Wellbeing Enquiry Line Tel: 01473 707999
- OneCall – 24hour advice from their hospice team Tel: 0800 567 0111
Marie Curie provides a range of services to support people affected by the death of a loved one. Whether the bereavement is expected, has happened recently or was some time ago. You can also speak to them before a loved one has died:
- mariecurie.org.uk – Bereavement support Tel: 0800 090 2309
The NSFT First Response is a 24/7 helpline offering immediate advice, support and signposting for people with mental health difficulties and is available to members of the public of any age, regardless of whether they are an existing NSFT service user:
- nsft.nhs.uk – First Response 24/7 Helpline Tel: 0808 196 3494
Suffolk County Council provides information to help you stay social, active and independent by finding groups, clubs, activities and services in your local community:
Suffolk InfoLink is an online directory of community information created by Suffolk County Council. It provides a platform for local clubs, societies, community and voluntary organisations, and public service providers to inform local communities about the support they offer.
You can share contact details of any of the directory entries with someone else by entering their mobile phone number and clicking ‘Send SMS’. The Short Message Service will send the contact details to their phone immediately.
We have listed links below to some of the bereavement support available on the directory, but encourage you to explore it further to find additional support that may help you to adjust to life after your loss:
- infolink.suffolk.gov.uk – More bereavement and social support groups
- infolink.suffolk.gov.uk – Co-op Bereavement Support Groups in Woodbridge, Hadleigh, Stowmarket, Leiston, Ipswich & Felixstowe.
- infolink.suffolk.gov.uk – Cruse Bereavement Care A voluntary organisation that is non-religious and non-political. They offer free bereavement support to adults and specialist support to children and young people. Bereaved people can self-refer.
- infolink.suffolk.gov.uk – Ipswich and District Widows Giving widow to widow support and providing a social life within the means of all widows.
- infolink.suffolk.gov.uk – Children and bereavement provides information that could help if your child has lost a loved one or if a loved one is dying.
- infolink.suffolk.gov.uk – Amparo Suffolk (part of the Listening Ear Charity) offers a range of support following a suicide.
- infolink.suffolk.gov.uk – loneliness, befriending and social support groups
The Faith and Spirituality Network (Suffolk) is a small unincorporated charity set up to bridge the gap between those who describe themselves as religious and may belong to a faith community, and those who see themselves as having a spiritual dimension to their lives, whether or not they adhere to a particular religious tradition. Their website has information about support systems for bereavements and funerals within faith communities in Suffolk:
Further information and additional resources
Asian Family Counselling Service – a registered national charity providing low-cost, confidential and culturally sensitive mental health and relationship counselling services in five languages to South Asian communities in Britain:
- asianfamilycounselling.org Tel: 020 8574 0912
Bereavement UK – a website offering free online support for the bereaved and those facing death of a close loved one:
Brake – a road safety charity offering emotional and practical support for road crash victims:
- brake.org.uk Tel: 0808 8000 401
Cruse Bereavement Care offer advice and support on many aspects of bereavement on their national website including:
- cruse.org.uk – Coronavirus, bereavement and grief
- cruse.org.uk – What to say when someone is grieving
- Helpline: 0808 808 1677
Grief Encounter – a website offering guidance on what to expect in bereavement during childhood:
- Helpline: 0208 904 8193 | 0208 908 6715
Hope Again – the youth website of Cruse Bereavement Care supporting bereaved children and their families:
- Helpline: 0808 808 1677
Muslim Community Helpline – a national organisation for women, men, youth and children offering a confidential, non-judgemental listening and emotional support service:
- Helpline: 0208 904 8193/0208 908 6715
Suffolk Learning Disability Partnership provides a leaflet and easy read booklets on their website that can be downloaded/printed to support people with learning disabilities through a bereavement:
Sue Ryder provides an online bereavement service with free and professional counselling to anyone living in the UK and 18+:
Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide (SoBS) – a charity providing support to meet the needs and overcome the isolation experienced by people over 18 who have been bereaved by suicide:
- uksobs.org Tel: 0300 111 5065
The Child Death Helpline is a freephone service for all those affected by the death of a child:
- childdeathhelpline.org.uk Tel: 0800 282 986 | 0808 800 6019
The Compassionate Friends (TCF) is a charitable organisation of bereaved parents, siblings and grandparents dedicated to the support and care of other similarly bereaved family members who have suffered the death of a child or children of any age and from any cause:
- TCF National UK Helpline Tel: 0845 123 2304
The Lullaby Trust –a charity offering confidential bereavement support to anyone affected by the sudden and unexpected death of a baby or young child:
- lullabytrust.org.uk – Bereavement support Tel: 0808 802 6868
The Mix – a charity offering support and advice across the UK for those aged 25 or under:
- themix.org.uk – Grief and bereavement Tel: 0808 808 4994 Text the Crisis Messenger: THEMIX to 85258
The Silver Line – a free confidential helpline providing information, friendship and advice to older people, open 24 hours a day, every day of the year:
- thesilverline.org.uk Tel: 0800 470 8090
The Samaritans provide support 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Whatever you’re going through, a Samaritan will face it with you:
- samaritians.org Tel: 116 123 (free)
WAY – a charity offering a peer-to-peer support network for anyone who’s lost a partner before their 51st birthday – married or not, with or without children, whatever their sexual orientation:
Winston’s Wish – a charity that supports bereaved children, young people, their families, and the professionals who support them across the UK. They provide in-depth therapeutic support in individual, group and residential settings, as well as a Freephone National Helpline, training for professionals and specialist publications:
- winstonswish.org Tel: 0808 802 0021